More forgetful in your 40s? What can you start doing now?

Forgetting a name, a password or where you left your keys now and then is common at any age. In your 40s, it often shows up more because work, family and money all need attention at the same time, and stress and short sleep make it harder to keep track. You can start now with simple habits: keep your keys, phone and glasses in one place, write things down, use calendar alerts, do one thing at a time, sleep 7 hours or more and move for at least 150 minutes a week. If forgetting starts to make everyday life hard, see a doctor.

Why do I seem more forgetful in my 40s?

For most people it is a mix of a fuller life and a few everyday factors, not one single cause. The US National Institute on Aging (NIA) explains that as people get older, some notice they do not recall information as quickly as before and occasionally misplace things, and calls this mild, everyday forgetfulness. In your 40s, several other things often pile on top.

Too many things at once

Your 40s are often the busiest decade: a demanding job, children's school, parents who need more help, bills and plans. When you are thinking about the next meeting while putting your keys down, you never really noticed where they went in the first place. The NHS advises not trying to do everything at once and setting small targets you can easily reach instead.

Stress

The NHS lists being forgetful, difficulty concentrating and struggling to make decisions among the mental signs of stress. The NIA adds that stressful life events and strong emotions can leave people confused or forgetful, and that this kind of forgetfulness usually improves as the stress and emotions fade.

If you also lose focus partway through tasks, see Why do I lose focus halfway through, and what can I do?.

Short or broken sleep

The NIA lists sleep problems among the factors that may cause memory problems. Late nights finishing work, scrolling on the phone in bed, or waking often in the night can all leave you less sharp the next day.

Alcohol and medicines

The NIA also lists drinking too much alcohol and medicine side effects. If you take medicines regularly and feel more forgetful since starting one, ask your doctor or pharmacist rather than stopping it yourself.

Changes around perimenopause

For women, the years before menopause often fall in the 40s. The NHS says some women notice problems with memory or concentration around perimenopause and menopause, and that this can feel worse when sleep is poor and you are very tired.

Is this kind of forgetfulness normal?

Forgetting things once in a while is normal at any age. The NIA and the NHS describe the difference this way: everyday forgetfulness is annoying but does not stop you from doing everyday things, while forgetting that makes daily life hard is a reason to get checked.

Source: NIA, NHS.

I'm 40 and forgetting things more often. What can I start doing now?

Start with habits that take the load off your head, so your attention goes to what matters. The NIA suggests the following tips for dealing with forgetfulness.

Give everyday things a fixed place

Put your wallet or bag, keys, phone and glasses in the same place each day, as the NIA suggests. A small tray by the door or a hook for the car and motorbike keys works well. Do the same for things you use at work, such as your ID card and charger.

Write it down and use reminders

The NIA suggests planning tasks, making to-do lists and using calendars and notes. Put appointments, bill due dates and school events into your phone calendar with an alert, and keep a short list for the day in your notes app or on paper. The NHS also says that planning ahead for busy days and making a list of things to remember can really help.

Do one thing at a time

When you are putting something down, sending money or locking the door, stop for a second and do only that. Say it in your head ("keys on the tray") if it helps. Leave replying to LINE messages until you have finished the task.

Keep a daily routine

The NIA suggests following a daily routine. Taking your medicines, paying bills or packing your bag at the same time each day means you rely less on remembering.

Which everyday habits does the NIA suggest for dealing with forgetfulness?

Alongside the tips above, the NIA lists getting enough sleep, exercising and eating well, limiting alcohol, spending time with friends and family, and learning new skills.

Sleep

The CDC recommends 7 hours or more of sleep for adults aged 18 to 60, going to bed and getting up at the same time every day, turning off devices at least 30 minutes before bed, and avoiding caffeine in the afternoon or evening. On busy weeks, protect your wake-up time first.

For more on adjusting your sleep, see Lighter sleep with age: how can you adjust your sleep?.

Moving

The NHS advises adults to do at least 150 minutes of moderate activity a week, spread over 4 to 5 days or every day, and strength activities on at least 2 days. Moderate means you can still talk but not sing: brisk walking around the neighbourhood, cycling or dancing all count. The NHS also advises breaking up long periods of sitting.

Eating well

The NIA includes "exercise and eat well" among its tips, and lists "not eating enough healthy foods" among the factors that may cause memory problems. Regular meals from a range of food groups are part of a healthy life at any age.

Learning and people

The NIA suggests learning a new skill and staying in touch with friends and family. A cooking class, a new language, a musical instrument or a regular meet-up with old friends all count.

Stress

The NHS suggests talking about how you feel with a friend, family member or health professional, using simple time-management techniques and breathing exercises, and not using alcohol or cigarettes to cope with stress. If stress keeps building up, see Stress keeps building up. How do I spot it and cope?

When should I see a doctor about forgetting things?

Most everyday forgetfulness does not need a doctor. But the NHS advises seeing a GP if memory problems are affecting your day-to-day life, and not trying to work out the cause yourself. Talk to a doctor if:

• you keep asking the same questions over and over
• you get lost in places you used to know well
• you have trouble following recipes or directions
• you are confused about the time, people or places
• forgetting has started to make daily life, work or driving hard
• forgetfulness linked to stress has not eased after a few weeks, as the NIA advises
• you have felt low or worried for weeks at a time
• you feel more forgetful since starting a new medicine

The NIA advises being cautious of pills, supplements and other products that claim to make the brain or memory sharper, and talking to your doctor first. The NHS says it can help to bring someone with you who can describe what they have noticed. If you are worried about an older relative who is becoming more forgetful, the NHS suggests talking to a GP about it too.